[00:00:00] Rita Black: Whether it happens late at night, during a stressful afternoon or after a string of being good binge eating can leave you feeling confused, ashamed, and out of control, you tell yourself it won’t happen again. But then it does, and again and again. And if that’s you, you’re not alone. And more importantly.

[00:00:25] Rita Black: You’re not a failure. In this episode, we’re gonna walk through five powerful mind shifts that can help you interrupt the binge cycle and begin to reclaim your power around food. And these just aren’t mindset tips. They are deep reframes that shift how you view urges, cravings, emotional chaos, and your relationship with your inner self.

[00:00:50] Rita Black: We’ll explore why binging isn’t weakness. It’s wiring. Why delaying a binge, even just 10 minutes can begin to retrain your brain and why the part of you that resists structure or rebels against rules may actually be crying out for care. Why planning ahead isn’t punishment. It’s self-compassion in action and why perfection is a trap that keeps you stuck while progress is what sets you free.

[00:01:19] Rita Black: And by the end of this episode, you’ll have new tools to approach binge George’s with clarity and compassion. Not shame, and if this conversation resonates with you, I’ll also be sharing how you can go deeper in my upcoming binge free online retreat workshop, a one day online retreat

[00:01:40] designed to help you shift patterns, soothe your nervous system, and begin a new chapter of healing with the help of hypnosis.

[00:01:48] Rita Black: And Mind Mastery tools. take a breath, you’re in the right place, and let’s explore these five mind shifts together.

[00:02:04] Rita Black: Did that our struggle with weight doesn’t start with the food on your plate or get fixed in the gym? 80% of our weight struggle is mental. That’s right. The key to unlocking long-term weight release and management begins in your mind. Hi there, I’m Rita Black. I’m a clinical hypnotherapist, weight loss expert, bestselling author, and the creator of the Shift Weight Mastery Process.

[00:02:32] Rita Black: And not only have I helped thousands of people over the past 20 years achieve long-term weight mastery. I am also a former weight struggler carb addict. And binge eater. And after two decades of failed diets and fad weight loss programs, I lost 40 pounds with the help of hypnosis. Not only did I release all that weight, I have kept it off for 25 years.

[00:02:58] Rita Black: Enter the Thin Thinking Podcast where you too will learn how to remove the mental roadblocks that keep you struggling. I’ll give you the thin thinking tools, skills, and insights to help you develop the mindset you need, not only to achieve your ideal weight. But to stay there long term and live your best life.

[00:03:18] Rita Black: Sound good?

[00:03:20] Let’s get started. Welcome, welcome. Come on in. Have a seat, not too near the fridge or the snack cupboard because we are gonna be talking about binge eating. come over here and sit by me. Ah, just where I’m at. I am back from Florida and my mother-in-law’s 90th birthday. I’ve been back for about a week, , and we had a lovely time.

[00:03:48] Rita Black: It was much fun, but it was very overstimulating, , family, right? And oh, guess what? I had a little mini binge, truth be told, and I stopped it before it got too far, but it reminded me of the long and deep. Binges that I used to have before I shifted. I hadn’t binged in a long time, not because I’m special, but because I really worked hard to break those patterns and needs, and it wasn’t overnight, but I worked subconsciously, and that helped tremendously.

[00:04:31] Rita Black: we are gonna talk about five of these mind shifts today, and I will tell you a little more about my Florida mini binge and how I circumvented it and how you can to break free with these mind shifts. And also binging can run deep and we can be engaged in the binge eating. Behavior is for years. I want you to know that I’m

[00:05:00] really excited about what I’m about to tell you, which is that I am doing a retreat.

[00:05:08] Rita Black: It’s an online retreat, a one day retreat. I. To, , and I’m calling it binge free, a one day online hypnosis retreat, and it’s happening on Saturday, July 19th. I’m leading a one day online retreat with hypnosis meditation processes, tapping to help you finally shift the subconscious root. Of binge eating that you can take your power back from food.

[00:05:36] Rita Black: It’s a full day guided, I said, coaching, tapping, hypnosis, and emotional rewiring to help you begin the process of breaking free from binge eating in a deeper and more impactful way that you can build consistency with balanced eating that actually lasts. And here’s the best part. You don’t have to be perfect.

[00:05:58] Rita Black: You just have to show up. the early bird registration is going on now through July 10th, 2025. , and you can actually save a hundred dollars, which is actually more than. The price, , making the discount bigger than the price of the workshop itself. visit www. shiftweightmastery. com/binge.

[00:06:21] Rita Black: Free to reserve your spot or visit the show notes. The link will also be there. That’s www. shiftweightmastery. com/binge. Free to reserve your spot. And as in addition, , I just wanted to tell you, because you’re probably

[00:06:40] thinking, well, I can’t make the 19th. Or , well a day is fine, but , binging is gonna take more than that.

[00:06:48] Rita Black: And you’re right. we are putting all of the workshop and the processes and the hypnosis. All of that is gonna go into an online program that we are creating, , that you will have access to forever. And you can access it through our online portal or the mobile app, you’ll have it right at your fingertips anytime you want.

[00:07:09] Rita Black: And I promise you, it’s, you are, I’m pouring my heart and soul into this, it’s gonna be good. And , and even if you can’t make that particular day the price of the workshop itself and , when you enroll and in the future, we will have this online as a program itself. The price of the workshop with the program is less than if you just enrolled.

[00:07:35] Rita Black: , in the program, the online version that we will be creating. even if you can’t make it, this will be a cheaper price point than, , buying it in the future online. So, , that’s that. , I hope, and if you have questions, let us know. , but if you go to the link, you’ll see it all listed there now.

[00:07:59] Rita Black: Let’s, , look at the five mind shifts to start moving out of the world of binge eating, shall we? So, first of all, setting the tone. I wanna say that for most of us, there is much stigma and shame around binge eating. It’s a world,

[00:08:20] it’s a painful and frustrating, but familiar world. It’s comfortable.

[00:08:26] Rita Black: Familiar and sometimes really pleasurable, and sometimes we try to leave this world, I’m not gonna binge eat anymore. We really try to leave, but then it’s being out on the street and it feels vulnerable and we feel naked and we go back, not because we are broken, but because we need to create a new, binge free world to go to.

[00:08:51] Rita Black: , when you leave the house of abuse, if you have nowhere else to go. You’re gonna end up back in the house of abuse. you’ve gotta create a new place to go. our binging world though, is, , it’s a secret little escape hatch that can feel really comfy. It’s a, an escape hatch from reality.

[00:09:13] Rita Black: It’s often our secret. Nobody knows. And if we thought they knew or if they, , saw the US binging, we would be horrified. I remember, I’ll tell you a story. So, , I just, FYI, just , if you’re like, well, Rita, , , you’ve maintained your ideal weight for years and years and years, 30 years now.

[00:09:37] Rita Black: But there was a time in my life where every day it seemed every day I was binging and binging hard. And, , and yes, I am binge free now. I, , I, that part of me is, . , it, I worked through and I healed that part of me. However, every once in a while I will erupt in the binge,

[00:10:00] and I want you to understand that even I have probably some of you who have worked with me and are maintaining your ideal weight, I.

[00:10:07] Rita Black: You might be binging every once in a while, and that is also just fine. it’s a part, there is a part of us that has a, a reaction, an emotional reaction, and , and we might revert back to that old behavior. But the difference is you have the tools. To move out of it, move outta that energy and , keep going.

[00:10:29] Rita Black: So, , , I just wanted to say that because I think a lot of us think if we’re struggling with weight, struggling with binging, is that. , perfection or there’s gonna be a time where we’re gonna be perfect. It’s gonna be we’re never gonna binge again. We’re never gonna, , well, not, never binge again.

[00:10:50] Rita Black: But what do I wanna say is that there’s this idea that we reach our ideal weight and then we’re done. Life is perfect, but life isn’t a. Ever evolving process. And that is why Weight Mastery, that is why binge Mastery is really about a set of skills and inner communication that you continue to evolve as well as you go through your life.

[00:11:11] Rita Black: And it’s not it’s hard work once you get the concepts, A lot of what you do on a day-to-day basis is working skills of something that you spent time learning and now you just do it because it’s a part of you. And that’s what I to say is to create a framework for you of this. Is a process, but you’re, you’re building skills.

[00:11:30] Rita Black: It’s not you’re trying not to do something anymore. You’re, you’re developing yourself into that person who is binge free. we’re gonna, we’re gonna look at that.

[00:11:40] anyway, to start this all off with, I, , was binging almost every day, living in New York. , this was after college. I was binging through college.

[00:11:50] Rita Black: I was carrying my binging on, , the, my binging kept going. I worked at this restaurant and many of that if you’ve been listening to my podcast or if you’re students of mine, and it was an Italian restaurant in Greenwich Village. And, , at the time it was the eighties. . And I loved, , having solace.

[00:12:12] Rita Black: I was in a, I was in an apartment with three other girls, , when we were overcrowded, I shared a room with another girl, , my best friend. But, , I needed my space sometimes. I, my boss was going away on vacation and I said to him, Hey, I can take care of your place for you. And he lived in a penthouse down in Greenwich Village, just like.

[00:12:32] Rita Black: In what is now Tribeca Soho area, but at the time it wasn’t fancy. It was kind of run down a little dangerous. , but he lived, , high above it all in a old building, but with a penthouse. And it was, it was, it was cool. It was very funky. , and, and anyway, that’s the, that is the scenario. he, and he was a Greek guy and, , very sweet man.

[00:12:56] Rita Black: Little sexist, but, , forgave him because he was a sweet guy and he, , let me stay. He was like, , this is the goldfish. You, you feed the goldfish, you do all this, and, , , there’s food around if, and I was like, no, no, no. I’m fine. I’m not gonna be eating your food. I’ll bring my own food and don’t worry about that.

[00:13:15] Rita Black: You, , I won’t be eating any of your food. off they went on their

[00:13:20] vacation. And they weren’t gone for long, but it was just long enough. anyway, I was on a diet at the time and that’s why I said I was gonna eat my own food. Don’t worry about it. I’m not gonna touch your food. Well, you can guess what happened.

[00:13:34] Rita Black: I, , , something happened. I got pissed off. Some sort of thing happened in my life. I don’t even remember what it was, but. I came back to the penthouse, , after this thing happened and I was like, I’ve got, like, I just, , I didn’t. , think about it as much as like, I just opened up a box of cookies and I started eating it.

[00:13:56] Rita Black: And, , the ferocity of a binge, it’s just like, you don’t even, you’re not even clocking everything that you’re eating. You’re just eating it. And I remember they had a lasagna in the fridge, so, the box of cookies, I was like, okay, I gotta remember this box of cookies. I need to replace it. I was just kind of, , thinking about the things I probably need to replace.

[00:14:15] Rita Black: And then there was this lasagna and I was like, well. I’ll just eat a couple of bites. I ate a couple of bites and then I went on to eat some other things and I was like, then I went back and ate more. I just kind of kept taking, well, they won’t notice this slice I take off. Oh, they’re not gonna notice this slice.

[00:14:30] Rita Black: Well, pretty soon that that whole half a lasagna was one tiny sliver of lasagna. And I just was like, oh my God, what am I gonna do? And, and I said, you kind of go into this trance state when you’re in the middle of a binge. And if you’ve been, , binging, what I’m talking about anyway.

[00:14:47] Rita Black: , long story short, I finished, well, short story along. I finished, , I, , I finally was like, oh my God, I, I hate myself, and stopped and kind of

[00:15:00] assessed the damage and I eaten a good lot of everything that they had left. And I went about trying to replace it, but of course, because I had gone south, I didn’t really pay attention to a lot of the things and I was like, did I get the right things?

[00:15:13] Rita Black: And I couldn’t really replace the lasagna. . they came back, , and I was like, Hey, okay. And I got the hell out of there and, but I, and he never ever mentioned to it, but I knew he knew, like, it was that little door on my secret, secret lockdown world. my roommates didn’t know, all of my binging was super private.

[00:15:40] Rita Black: I remember binging in the back of the coat check room at the place where I worked, , just shoving butter. , breadsticks dipped in butter in my mouth behind mink coats. Like, , it was it was real. But it was my little world. My boss didn’t know I was, , my other boss though, I had, , I worked at a lot of places, , rent was expensive in New York City.

[00:16:04] Rita Black: What can I say? You go work a lot of jobs and anyway, that, so, that was one of many, many, many, many, many, many, many episodes. But, but, but that shame, but that secret shame world that we create, it’s, it’s a world. And so, , we, and we bury it again, we don’t want even to see it ourselves. Once we’re out of it, we, we don’t, we wanna ignore it.

[00:16:31] Rita Black: We wanna know that we’re trying not to do it anymore. We, but. It exists, and then every once in a while it will

[00:16:40] erupt from the darkness into another binge. instead of hiding it and burying it, let’s bring it and ourselves to the light. mind shift number one is you are not a failure. You are wired for survival, and you have been using binging to survive.

[00:17:02] Rita Black: Good for you. I repeat that. Good for you. Listen. Binge eating is a coping mechanism driven by the brain’s survival wiring. It’s not a personal flaw when you reach for food in an emotional storm. It’s not weakness, it’s wiring The good news. Wiring can be rewired. Binge eating can be understood as a maladaptive survival mechanism.

[00:17:33] Rita Black: An ancient, biological and neurological response wired into us for protection, comfort, and energy storage. let’s go way back. Way, way back to the earliest binges, our primitive ancestors. And yes, they were huge binges, big, big, big time binges because our brain evolved in environments where food was scarce and unpredictable, and when calories were unavailable, it made evolutionary sense to eat large.

[00:18:04] Rita Black: Amounts, especially high fat, high sugar foods for energy storage. That instinct still lives in our brain’s limbic system, particularly the amygdala and the hypothalamus, which override rational thought

[00:18:20] during perceived threats In modern times, the threat isn’t famine, it’s emotional overwhelm, stress, loneliness, or shame, but your survival brain can’t tell the difference.

[00:18:33] Rita Black: And I repeat, your survival brain can’t tell the difference. When. When stress activates your sympathetic nervous system, your fight or flight response, your brain scrambles for ways to self-soothe and stabilize. Binge eating activates the dopamine in opioid pathways, giving you a neurochemical high and relief from the feelings of stress or discomfort.

[00:18:59] Rita Black: It numbs pain. It anchors you. Just as some people disassociate or lash out, others binge. It’s not a moral failing, it’s a survival response. High carb, high fat foods, often what we reach for in a binge, they will trigger insulin spikes. And that reduces cortisol temporarily, they will, , trigger serotonin production, which calms anxiety.

[00:19:29] Rita Black: They will trigger dopamine release, which momentarily, , gives you pleasure and focus, and these foods become your brain’s go-to medicine. For regulating an internal state, it perceives as dangerous or dysregulated. over time, the binge becomes wired into a Q behavior reward cycle. Q, stress, boredom, emotion happening behavior.

[00:19:56] Rita Black: The binge and the reward is comfort,

[00:20:00] numbness and distraction. And the brain learns this loop it would learn to pull your hand away from a hot stove. It becomes automatic, especially when executive function from your prefrontal cortex is offline due to emotional overload. Also, interestingly enough, emotional starvation is interpreted as physical starvation.

[00:20:28] Rita Black: If a person feels emotionally deprived of love, of safety, of belonging or control, the brain often translates that as a survival emergency, and food becomes the easiest accessible source of. Enoughness emotional hunger gets mistaken for physical hunger. The body eats to fill a different kind of hole. And understanding binge eating as a survival adaptation, not as a personal failure is key.

[00:21:03] Rita Black: mind shift one. You are not the problem. Binging was a solution you used to survive. Good for you. let’s shift out of the binge shame and into binge acceptance. Why? Because once you own that, you binge, you can heal it. Yeah. But if you’re trying to bury it or pretend it’s not happening, or try to get rid of it, this unacceptable behavior that you’re not that you do because there’s something wrong with you,

[00:21:40] you’re not gonna heal that.

[00:21:42] Rita Black: first let’s have some, , acceptance and self-compassion around it. I invite you to repeat after me. You don’t have to. I’m just, it’s just an invitation. I used binging to survive. It was what I used to cope good for me. And let’s do that all together now. I,

[00:22:13] Rita Black: I used binging to survive. It was what I used to cope. Good for me.

[00:22:23] Rita Black: One last time I used Bing to survive. It was what I used to cope. Good for me. And now give yourself a hug and give Bingeing a hug. Take a nice deep breath in and own it. All right. Mind shift one down. Now let’s move to mind shift two. after that reframing of binging, let’s shift you out of words to describe yourself in relation to the habit of binging.

[00:23:02] Rita Black: Because our binge identity can also keep us locked in the cycle and in that world as we see ourselves, often we can label ourselves with in relationship to our binging habit as compulsive. A food

[00:23:20] addict, out of control, a failure, a food freak, a greedy. These words and how we label ourselves keep us in that world of binging.

[00:23:32] Rita Black: And I invite you to start shifting the way you see yourself as well. As you begin to move in the direction of becoming binge free, you can find an identity that feels good and represents the fact that you are progressing out of the binge survival mode to taking care of yourself in other ways. Not overnight mind you, but you are on the path.

[00:23:58] Rita Black: here are some ideas, but feel free to use other words, please. So, reclaimer, reclaimer. I am a reclaimer. I am taking back my power from food. This signifies agency healing and ownership of the process. Reclaimer. Alright, now here’s another one. Disruptor. I disrupt the cycle. I don’t obey old patterns.

[00:24:28] Rita Black: This is strong, active, and very anti victim mindset, right? Disruptor. Here’s another one, pattern breaker. I break old survival patterns and I build new pathways. And this is compassionate, yet powerful re framing that honors the past wiring while choosing change. Pattern breaker. How does that one feel?

[00:24:58] Rita Black: Okay, here’s another one.

[00:25:00] Liberator. Liberator. I liberate myself from the binge shame cycle. This emphasizes freedom from the binge pattern liberate. And last one, self-compassion warrior. I fight for myself with kindness, not control. This is perfect for heart-centered, yet fierce identity, self-compassion warrior.

[00:25:29] Rita Black: try those on for size and if you don’t them or you might find one that you love, that’s fine. You don’t, I, I would chick pick one. Don’t pick them all. And then, , and if you don’t any of them, find your own. , but hopefully. Your, your mind is starting to expand around this idea of identity.

[00:25:48] Rita Black: It’s the first step of breaking out of old habit patterns. Alright, now moving on to, we’ve changed our world, how we see ourselves, we’re breaking outta the old world, moving into a new one with our new identity. And now mind shift three. Let’s look at the trip wires and how we begin to interrupt the cue to binge.

[00:26:10] Rita Black: We’ll call this the power of the pause and befriending the inner Rebel. let’s talk about a moment that can feel impossibly hard, but actually is full of power, and that is the moment just before a binge. When the craving starts to build, your nervous system is already halfway to shut down. Logic is slipping out the back door.

[00:26:36] Rita Black: Emotion is rising a tide, and all you can think about

[00:26:40] now is, I need to eat right now, or I will explode. But here’s the shift. Delay is not denial. It’s power. Binge urges are waves. They build, they crest, and yes, they fall by simply delaying just 10 minutes. You are not depriving yourself. You are training your brain to tolerate intensity without handing the steering wheel over to a habit loop.

[00:27:20] Rita Black: That pause is called a pattern interrupt. A wedge that gives you and your wiser mind a chance to reengage. Even if you still do binge afterwards, that delay is a win. You just created a space where there was none before, and space is where change begins, but what often fills that space in the pause. Why the inner Rebel does, of course, she’s the voice that flares up and says, I don’t care.

[00:27:55] Rita Black: I want it. I deserve it. I’m tired of being good. I want this. And the instinct we have is to shut her down, to scold her, to fight her. But guess what? That only makes her louder, right? here’s what I wanna offer instead. Your inner rebel isn’t your enemy. She’s your unmet

[00:28:20] need speaking. She’s trying to protect you from restriction, from pain and from shame.

[00:28:30] Rita Black: And instead of shaming her, sit down with her, get curious. Ask her, what do you really want right now? It’s not just food. What else? What else underneath this do you want? Sometimes it’s rest. Sometimes it’s comfort. Sometimes it’s the power to say no to something else entirely. But when you listen to her, she softens, she integrates, and she becomes a part of your inner support team, not a saboteur.

[00:29:04] Rita Black: in those 10 minutes of pause, you’re not just resisting food, you’re building a relationship with the parts of you that binging once silenced. You are saying inner rebel or inner binger. I see you. I hear you. And we’re strong enough to wait. That’s not a small act. That my friend is a revolution. And now I am going to talk about my mini binge because this, we’ll just give you an example and I’m gonna walk you through a little five step process that I use in that 10 minute, , interrupt that pattern.

[00:29:52] Rita Black: Interrupt that 10 minute pause. here is the story. , we went to Florida for five

[00:30:00] days. That’s my maximum. Not for Florida, but just for being in the family situation. I love my mother-in-law to death. it was her 90th birthday and we went to celebrate her. She had a party, , and she’s an amazing woman.

[00:30:16] Rita Black: So, and , I met her when I was 23. I’m 60 now. in, in many ways, she has become my mother. I call her my fairy godmother because she, , helped me. S in many times in my life, both, , monetarily, just to be generous, to like, help pay for some education. She, , was a friend to me, really. , she was a, a gr she’s a very gregarious, very intelligent woman.

[00:30:42] Rita Black: And I, and my mother was kind of very different, very nurturing and loving. But different from her. And I got a whole new skillset from observing her and just seeing, , what a remarkable woman she was. Like, it just. I have nothing but love, respect, and, and, and consider myself very blessed to have had, , Margaret as my mother-in-law.

[00:31:07] Rita Black: But we, we, so, but we’re going and, and my husband has a sister and a brother and, and they’re lovely people too, but when, , there’s 1, 2, 3, 4, or five. Six adults and then other, , family and friends coming in. It’s a lot of stimulation and there’s lots of layers of feelings going on, especially around siblings and love and mother love and all of that stuff.

[00:31:33] Rita Black: And I’m sure you don’t need to, . Yeah, me, me to explain this to me, there’s a saying, you

[00:31:40] know, your family, , doesn’t push your buttons. They installed them, which I think is brilliant because it’s true. I have a, a set of buttons from my own biological family. But I also, because I’ve been with my husband for long, I do have buttons.

[00:31:59] Rita Black: In, , his family as well. And these buttons that get pushed actually are from my childhood. They have nothing to do with the, the current circumstances, but, , anyway, there were just some things going on. Let’s just say, I’m not gonna get into details. Sorry. I’m sure you would love to hear all the details, but it was just we came back from, we went, went to hang out one day and there was just a lot going on.

[00:32:23] Rita Black: And we came back to our Airbnb and on our way back we went to Target to get some healthy food for our house. ’cause we weren’t really eating too much there. And, , , I wanted to get some Turkey and some just some, , snicky snacks that were, were healthy and we did, we got those things. But we also got, , my, , I don’t to buy, , g , really refined foods, but every once in a while I’ll buy.

[00:32:51] Rita Black: What I consider, , okay. Gac, which would be Quest or, , the Quest. And we found in Target, they had these quest new, , types of like, it looked a Pringle can that had cheddar cheese, , potato chips basically. And my husband was like, Ooh, these are interesting. And I was like, okay, well let’s get those.

[00:33:14] Rita Black: And then I love the Quest birthday cake. Cake cookies that our 90

[00:33:20] calories each or something that. And they, they’ve got protein in them. , you think, ah, that’s fine. we buy those, we buy some other things and off we go, get back to the Airbnb. And I’ve got the storm brewing in me, , I’ve got these feelings and emotions.

[00:33:34] Rita Black: It was just very overstimulated. It was about our third day in. I was tired. I hadn’t been sleeping well. And I get back to the hotel and my husband, I, I, my husband and I are curious about these Quest potato chips. we open them up and I start eating them and they’re really, really salty. They aren’t really even good.

[00:33:54] Rita Black: In fact, they were not good. But , every single. Refined food manufacturer is, is really making that product to stimulate the, the drug center in your brain. And even though it wasn’t a good tasting experience, the crunch, the salt, all of that, and I’m not a salty, crunchy person either. I’m not, I, I, , can, I can leave potato chips behind.

[00:34:19] Rita Black: they don’t, aren’t my thing. That’s the sweet stuff. That’s my thing. anyway, though, for whatever reason, I just could not stop eating these. These potato chip D things and I finally put the thing on the lid or the lid on the thing. And I said to my husband, take this away. Go in the other, , you’re going in the other room, just take those with you.

[00:34:43] Rita Black: ’cause I can’t be near them right now. I don’t know what’s going on with me in them. And he’s like, okay. , he knows me well enough to just get the food outta sight. , he’s well-trained, he did that. But that wasn’t enough.

[00:35:00] I saw those Quest cookies in there and I opened them up and I ate one and it was, , I was like, it was soft.

[00:35:05] Rita Black: It was, , sweet, whatever. And I ate one and I was gonna leave the kitchen. And then my brain said, well, well there’s more there. You can have another one. I went acting and I ate another one. And then as I was finishing up that second one, eyeing a third, I was like, okay, Rita, take a pause and. I realized that energy that was building up in me was like, I could have eaten every cookie in that box.

[00:35:34] Rita Black: I could have moved on to the next thing and eating even the healthy food as binge food, right? I would’ve just eaten everything in the fridge, ? And I, I said, I’m, I don’t fall into this pattern. Typically, but I took a pause and I knew what, , I, I know what to do to take care of myself and communicate with myself, but it was like, I was surprised by the power of that binge, the, the, the power behind what I was feeling inside my body.

[00:36:04] Rita Black: And I was like, wow, I am binging. And that is the first thing to really say, because binges are powerful and they take us by. Surprise sometimes, sometimes we plan them, but even in the planning that there’s a, there’s a, there’s a momentum behind binging and to stop and just. Declare, like, because much of binging is shameful, we even in the moment don’t even wanna acknowledge it.

[00:36:32] Rita Black: We’re just, it’s kind of under the radar eating. But I just said, wow, I am binging. And it was without shame. It was

[00:36:40] not self-abusive. It was just a declarative, like, I am binging. And when I said that to myself and I took a breath, I, I kind of cut through all the. , stuff going on my brain and I brought myself into the present moment where I am a compassionate, , , able to take care of myself, human being.

[00:37:06] Rita Black: I had, I, I was like, it was I was calling my inner coach in and calling my inner resource center in, and you have this too. And the more you start to access this in those moments, the more you can start to communicate with yourself. But it is a, it is. It. It is a pattern interrupt and then you have to start to build this out.

[00:37:27] Rita Black: It’s not gonna happen automatically, it’s not gonna happen overnight. It’s something that, it’s a skill, right? But, but once you start building it, then it just makes much sense. I stopped, I said I’m in a binge and I owned it. That was step one, step two. Was to say, what is going on with me? What’s going on underneath all this food?

[00:37:50] Rita Black: What are the feelings that I’m feeling right now? And what I do is I open up my heart and let all this, those feelings in and, , my brain will say you’re overstimulated, but underneath I, I don’t just use one blanket emotion or term because there’s many, many, many, many emotions going on underneath that.

[00:38:11] Rita Black: And, and when I can label them all. And that is what begins to calm me down. That is what begins to, to, ,

[00:38:20] anchor me into reality. I said, I’m feeling resentment. I am feeling envy. And these are words I don’t like. , you don’t wanna admit you’re envious. You don’t want to admit you’re resentful, you don’t not wanna res, but when I say them, they calm me down because they’re my truth.

[00:38:38] Rita Black: I will just call. I am feeling, , resentful. I am feeling pissed off. I am feeling sad and vulnerable and stupid and insecure. , I just named all those feelings and I was like, wow, that is a lot going on with me. ? ’cause you’re not aware of it. It’s all subconscious. once I had said that all, I was like, okay, okay, I have this all in.

[00:39:06] Rita Black: And the interesting thing is when you start naming them, even just naming them starts to calm you down and starts to calm the emotions themselves down. So, but I’m feeling, and I’m sitting and I said, Ooh, how are these all feeling in my body? ’cause I want to connect with my body. And then I’m connecting with my little inner rebel, and I’m like, inner rebel, what’s going on?

[00:39:25] Rita Black: What do you need, honey? Because she’s in there and she’s a tantruming child. She’s like, you’re not listening to me, mommy. ? And I wanna be heard, ? And I get your attention when I, I go to food. I was like, yeah, yeah, I get it. what do you need? What do we need? What do we need? Not, it’s not food.

[00:39:43] Rita Black: What do you need? She’s like, I need to calm down. I need to rest. I need a nap. I need to just not be in Florida with all these people around me. I just need to be alone and with myself, , because I’m not an extrovert as much as you would

[00:40:00] imagine, because I love blah on these podcasts all the time, but I’m, I’m kind of a extroverted introvert or an omni vert as they’re, they are called.

[00:40:10] Rita Black: And so, . I get very overstimulated. And I went and I, I trashed those cookies, , I just took them and I threw ’em away. I knew better. It took a lot. It took a lot. I’m gonna be honest with you. That was hard to do. ’cause I don’t to waste things, but I also don’t wanna waste myself and my time and my mind, my mind got totally hijacked.

[00:40:36] Rita Black: I went in my bedroom where my husband was. And he was sitting on the bed doing something on his laptop, and I just went into my side of the bed. I pulled the covers. I said, I’m gonna go under, , and he was like, okay. He knows me very well and I pulled the covers over my head and I got in the fetal position and I just.

[00:40:58] Rita Black: Was there calming that little girl down for about 20 minutes. I said, it’s okay. We’re okay. We’re safe. You’re a wonderful human being. You’re a whole and complete. You are enough as you are, , and, and I just had to kind of soothe myself and be there for myself. And I began to calm down again, a breathe, and then I got up.

[00:41:27] Rita Black: And I went back into the kitchen and I made a cup of tea and I ate a little yogurt just to kind of stabilize myself. And I went and sat out in the sunshine, allowed the Florida sun to be on my

[00:41:40] face, even though it was very humid. But I just like, I need to be outside. And then I went for a little walk, and then I, I was like, I’m good.

[00:41:48] Rita Black: I feel better. I feel, , I didn’t stuff myself. I had, I intercepted that, but I, , I had moved on. So. , and, and in that moment I wanna add one other step that I took and I’ll then, I’ll repeat these steps is I said, here’s your choice, kid, , to my little rebel. It’s like, we can keep eating and then we know how that feels.

[00:42:11] Rita Black: , which is not good. And here’s the thing, when we’re used to binging, we’re used to numbing out, right? we disconnect from our body, we disconnect from ourself. But when you remove the shame, when you allow yourself to declare a binge, and you’re like, I’m bingeing, how does that feel in my body? And you start to really connect your body to your brain.

[00:42:33] Rita Black: And feel that feeling, and it’s not a good feeling. And it’s really, it takes a lot of courage to feel these feelings of like, wow. I’m like, my belly is full, I’m ugh. , this feels horrible. My blood sugar is dysregulated. All those feelings when you own them, then your brain remembers it, it gets it.

[00:42:54] Rita Black: It’s like, oh, this is where we end up. Because otherwise when you disconnect, your brain doesn’t. F forgets that binging makes you feel crap and makes you ashamed. It doesn’t remember, but when you sit with it and you own it without the shame, you’re like, this is what that feels like. You start to get an aversion to it.

[00:43:14] Rita Black: It’s like, Ugh, I don’t wanna feel that. Now there’s the alt alternate route where you

[00:43:20] can offer yourself that vision of the future you want, which is like, we could put this all away, get rid of it, go take care of ourselves, and feel light and aligned. And move on with our day, or at least even if you’ve binged to feel we’re aligned with ourselves and we’re moving on with our day and we’ve learned a lesson, right?

[00:43:40] Rita Black: there is a way of being with yourself, offering yourself that vision of the two futures. And when you start offering your brain this, your brain will start going for the better future. It just will, but, but it takes time, it takes patience. But you’re retraining your dopamine. You’re saying dopamine center, this is not pleasure.

[00:44:00] Rita Black: This is pleasure. The alternative route is the pleasure. Does that make sense? I hope it does. here is the five steps that I do. I acknowledge the whatever’s going on, I acknowledge that I am binging, or I’m acknowledging the thought to binge, I’m really thinking about binging. I’m thinking about going home and binging.

[00:44:23] Rita Black: What are all the feelings that are going on? , and let all those feelings, get underneath the lid bit and allow yourself to feel those feelings. Or to allowed yourself to name the feelings and then feel the feelings in your body. Where are they? What do they feel like? Ooh, my chest is tight.

[00:44:38] Rita Black: My stomach is tight. , there was a comedian we were watching just last night. My son is home, , for a few days, and, , he likes to watch this very politically incorrect, , man from the, who is very, who is now canceled, but , was very, very popular in the early two thousands. I won’t, I won’t say his name.

[00:45:00]

[00:45:00] Rita Black: , he’s funny, but he’s racist and he’s sexist. anyway, he , he said something, but he’s a binge eater, this comedian, and he had gained a bunch of weight and he was talking about it and he was saying, , some people eat until they’re full. I eat until I hate myself. And I went, and that made me laugh.

[00:45:24] Rita Black: Not from that, it was funny, but out of recognition. And, , that feeling that you feel when you hate, when you presence that and you go, well, I can hate myself later today, or I can love myself later today and, and take action to really show up for myself right now here in this moment.

[00:45:41] Rita Black: I have that opportunity. , , then hopefully your, your offering. So, first acknowledge. Then label all the feelings and, and feel them, and then ask that, rebel, what’s going on? What do you need? What do you find the deeper need? And try to give that to yourself. You might not be able to, but usually it’s nurturing.

[00:46:02] Rita Black: Usually it’s love. Usually it’s some sort of, , , thing that you really can give your rebel. And then, because, , if a child came up to you with a skinned knee, you’re not gonna put ice cream on it. You’re gonna tend to the wound, right. And then offer her the two futures. Okay, well we can go this way.

[00:46:24] Rita Black: We can eat everything and feel this way, but do we really wanna do that? Here’s the alternate future, feeling light, feeling connected to ourselves, feeling good and, and again, you’re not shaming her and saying, well, these are our two futures, but it’s these are our two

[00:46:40] futures and I really believe we could have that better future.

[00:46:43] Rita Black: What do you think? And then give her what she needs, that nap or a bath or a moment or some respect. So. Does that make sense? I hope it does. we have shifted out of the binge shame world. We have binge , we, we have shifted out of the binge identity and now we are learning how to take that powerful pause and communicate powerfully with all the parts of ourself.

[00:47:09] Rita Black: And now let’s move to mind shift four, which planning is self-compassion in action. let’s talk about planning, shall we, not as punishment, but as profound. Self-care because here’s the truth. A binge thrives in chaos in moments of decision fatigue, overwhelm, emotional overwhelm, or sheer exhaustion. The brain reaches for what’s fast, easy, and emotionally rewarding without a plan.

[00:47:42] Rita Black: You are at the mercy of the moment, and the moment is rarely thinking long term, right? I know for many people the word planning brings up resistance. I don’t wanna plan. I’m not a planner. And it can feel rigid and restrictive a throwback to dieting, , food rules that made us feel small or judged or out of control.

[00:48:03] Rita Black: But this is different. This, this is planning as an act of kindness towards your future self. when you take five minutes in the morning or the night before to sketch out what you want to eat and how you wanna move your body, or

[00:48:20] simply how you wanna feel in your body throughout the day, you’re not trapping yourself.

[00:48:24] Rita Black: You are freeing yourself from decision overload. You’re anchoring your nervous system in predictability and calm, and you’re saying to your future self, I love you enough to make this easier for you. Think of it laying out your clothes the night before, not because you’re punishing yourself, but because you wanna wake up and move into your day with clarity, not chaos.

[00:48:51] Rita Black: A food plan doesn’t have to be perfect. Or elaborate. It can be flexible. It can include your favorite comfort meals, but it should improve, , it should include protein and, , and especially if you’re moving out of a binge, not tri, , absolutely not trigger foods, but . It should be lowering carbohydrates just in the sense of not the refined carbohydrates.

[00:49:17] Rita Black: , , you want wholesome foods that are gonna stabilize and nourish you, but not restrict you. it can include some favorite comfort meals. let’s reframe planning, not as control, but as compassion. Not as diet culture, but as liberation from food chaos. Because every time you plan, you’re writing a love letter to the version of you.

[00:49:42] Rita Black: You wanna wake up tomorrow and say, thank you. You made it easier to care for myself today. Now, number five. planning. We’ve got planning,

[00:50:00] we’ve got the pause. We’ve got the identity and we’ve got the new world. And the last step, perfection. Knowing that perfection is a setup for failure and progress is the absolute point.

[00:50:15] Rita Black: here’s, let me ask you, let’s be honest. How many times have you said something like, well, I blew it. I might as well start over tomorrow. Or, I was doing well until I messed up. We say it all the time. I have students or members, , and, and we all work on this. This is, , that, that impulse to start over tomorrow, there’s a whole mindset and skillset and communication set around shifting out of that world, right?

[00:50:47] Rita Black: , but that, I’ll start over tomorrow. Impulse is strong and it’s the voice of black and white thinking all or nothing, good or bad. On track or off the rails. And this mindset is the problem, not the food. That is what keeps the binge cycle alive. Because once the perfection illusion is broken even slightly, it’s easy to spiral.

[00:51:12] Rita Black: One cookie becomes a box of cookies. One moment of emotional eating becomes, what the hell? I don’t care. I blew it. screw it. here’s your new truth. You don’t have to be perfect. Be powerful and you don’t have to be perfect to keep going. One aligned choice right in the middle of the mess can interrupt the spiral.

[00:51:36] Rita Black: You can stop, you can breathe, and you can come

[00:51:40] back to yourself. I will repeat that. You can stop, you can breathe, you can come back to yourself. I’m gonna offer you some mantras to carry with you in those moments. I am moving in the direction of comforting myself without food. I’ll say that one again.

[00:52:01] Rita Black: I’m moving in the direction of comforting myself without food. I am learning, not failing. I’ll say that again. I’m learning not failing a misstep doesn’t erase my progress. It gives me a chance to practice compassion. Again, a misstep doesn’t erase my progress. It gives me a chance to practice compassion.

[00:52:25] Rita Black: This moment matters more than the one before it, and I will say that again. This moment matters more than the one before it, because the real magic, I promise you, happens not in the black or the white, but in the gray, not in the fantasy of perfection. But in the courage of coming back, of bringing yourself back on track again and again and again, building that skill, building that inner communication progress is messy.

[00:53:02] Rita Black: It’s human it, it’s built one loving, one, honoring choice at a time. I said, it’s an ever evolving journey with yourself. Weight mastery is a skillset and it’s a mindset, and. It is an evolution. It is a

[00:53:20] journey, and it never ends. I am still on that journey. I am still evolving. As you can see with my little binge in Florida.

[00:53:28] Rita Black: I am still on the path because my life is always changing. The world is changing. , my inner life is changing, it would be foolish to think we’re going to get to our ideal weight and stay stuck in this rigid set of rules and patterns. It has to be flexible. We have to be flexible, and we have to keep evolving, observing, and showing up for ourselves again and again with compassion and with strategy, and with that powerful inner coach.

[00:54:00] Rita Black: the next time you hear that inner voice saying, you ruined everything, try answering back with this. Nope, I’m still here. I’m still evolving, and I’m still on the road of weight mastery. I’m still here, I’m still evolving, and I’m still on the road of weight mastery. That is the voice of transformation, and that’s how you become someone who no longer binges, not because they’re perfect.

[00:54:27] Rita Black: But because they’ve practiced showing up imperfectly and powerfully over time. let’s review mind shift one, you’re not a failure. You are wired for survival. Now that binge eating isn’t about weakness, it’s about survival. Wiring the brain was doing something it believed would protect you, and the beautiful news wiring can be wired, re rewired.

[00:54:53] Rita Black: Okay, mind shift two. Create a new identity. Step into that

[00:55:00] powerful identity as you let go of that old binge identity. Mind. Shift three. Delay is not denial, it’s power. We learned how cravings rise and fall waves, and just a 10 minute pause can be enough to disrupt the loop and reengage your wiser self.

[00:55:18] Rita Black: Even one delay is progress. And in the moment your rebel isn’t sabotaging you. She’s trying to protect you from restriction, shame, and unmet needs. when you listen to her with curiosity instead of criticism, she becomes an ally, not an adversary. Mind. Shift four, planning is self-compassion in action.

[00:55:40] Rita Black: Planning isn’t punishment. It’s a kindness. It’s a way to reduce. Decision overwhelm, create calm and support the version of you that wants to move through the day with intention, not impulse mind. Shift five. Perfection is a setup. Progress is the point. You don’t need to be perfect. And fact perfection is often the trap one aligned choice, even after a binge can shift everything.

[00:56:09] Rita Black: It’s not about starting over, it’s about starting from where you are. All right, my friends. I hope you found today’s session helpful. , I hope that you, you’re feeling, , you’re feeling you’re, you’ve got some new places to start from and a new reframe on yourself and your world. And please, on Saturday, July 19th, 2025, come and join me for one

[00:56:40] special day, an online retreat.

[00:56:42] Rita Black: From 8:30 AM to 3:00 PM Pacific Time designed to help you finally shift the subconscious root of binge eating you can take your power back from food. The binge free one day online hypnosis retreat is a full day of guided coaching, tapping hypnosis, and emotional rewiring to help you begin the process of breaking free from binge eating in a deeper and more impactful way.

[00:57:09] Rita Black: Early bird registration is now open. You can save a hundred dollars. You will also get the program online about a week after the process, and even if you have to miss the process. The enrollment fee right now is less expensive than what it will be offered for online eventually. click , the link in the show notes or , go to www. shiftweightmastery. com/binge free and sign up.

[00:57:41] Rita Black: I will really look forward to being with you and spending that day creating a powerful transformation. , so. And if you can’t make it, don’t worry because next week, , the, , we will be back and remember that the key and probably the only key to unlocking the door of the weight struggle is inside you.

[00:58:04] Rita Black: keep listening and find it. I will be with you here next week. Have a wonderful, wonderful week. Thanks for listening to The Thin Thinking Podcast. Did that episode go by way too fast for

[00:58:20] you? If so, and you wanna dive deeper into the mindset of long-term weight release, head on over to www shift weight mastery. com.

[00:58:31] Rita Black: That’s www shift weight mastery. com, where you’ll find numerous tools and resources to help you unlock your mind for permanent weight release tips, strategies, and more. And be sure to check the show notes.